Domestic and Family Violence 

Who can experience domestic and family violence? 

Everyone has the right to feel safe in their relationships, family and home. If someone is behaving in a way that is violent, threatening, controlling, or intended to make you feel scared and unsafe, this could be domestic and family violence (DFV).  

Domestic and family violence can happen in any relationship, regardless of gender or sexuality. LGBTIQA+ people are just as likely to experience DFV as other people. Nonbinary and transgender people may be more likely to experience DFV than cisgender people. 

For violence to be legally considered domestic or family violence the people involved must have a relationship that is recognised as a “relevant relationship” in the legislation. A relevant relationship is either an intimate personal relationship, a family relationship, or an informal care relationship. 

Intimate personal relationships are between people who have a romantic or sexual relationship, whether or not they are dating, living together, de-facto or married. Relationships that are asexual or aromantic may still be considered intimate.  

In polyamorous relationships or relationships with more than two people, each connection between two people is considered a relationship. This means that if multiple people in a relationship are using violence, the victim-survivor should seek protection from them in separate applications. If multiple people are in need of protection they should each make their own application against the person using violence. Please contact LGBTI Legal Service if you would like more information about your specific relationship and DFV.  

Family relationships are any relationship between people who are relatives.  A relative is any person who is generally understood to be, or have previously been, connected to that person by blood, marriage or adoption. A relative may also be a relationship where both people consider each other to be relatives, including chosen family. 

DFV can occur in LGBTIQA+ chosen families though it may not be recognised as DFV by police and service providers, or under the law. If you are in this situation, please contact LGBTI Legal Service for advice about your specific circumstances.  

An informal care relationship will exist between people where one is dependent on the other person for help in everyday life. This could be a person who helps you with dressing and personal grooming, food preparation and shopping, or making your medical appointments. 

What is domestic and family violence? 

DFV includes more than just physical violence. It is any abusive behaviour that is used to dominate or control someone. 

DFV includes identity-based abuse, ways that somebody may use your identity to control you. For nonbinary people this may look like: 

  • Nonbinary-phobia, and other anti-LGBTIQA+ behaviour and statements 
  • Isolating you from the nonbinary and wider LGBTIQA+ community 
  • Not respecting your identity including misgendering, deadnaming, refusing to use your correct pronouns 
  • Threatening to share private images, such pictures of you before coming out or medical transition, or intimate images 
  • Controlling access to gender affirming healthcare, such as taking away medication, or pressuring you to medically transition 
  • Controlling your gender expression, such as your clothing, hair, way of speaking 

Other forms of violence include: 

  • Physical abuse e.g. physical violence, physical aggression towards your pets or belongings, physically preventing you from leaving, intentionally transmitting HIV 
  • Sexual abuse e.g. pressuring you to have sex when you don’t want to, forcing or pressuring you into having unsafe sex, not disclosing HIV status and having unprotected sex 
  • Verbal abuse e.g. yelling, shouting, making verbal threats, name-calling and using slurs, deadnaming, misgendering, swearing 
  • Emotional or psychological abuse e.g. constant criticism, name-calling, intentionally embarrassing you, threatening suicide or self-harm if you leave, blaming you for their behaviour, ‘outing’ you or threatening to ‘out’ you, hurting your pets or threatening to hurt your pets, pressuring you to present more feminine or masculine, making you feel overly sensitive or emotional, undermining your judgment
  • Social abuse e.g. isolating you from friends, family and community, preventing you from attending LGBTIQA+ events, isolating you from your cultural background and practices, threatening to publicly embarrass you in front of members of your community 
  • Economic abuse e.g. taking your wages, blocking access to your bank accounts, refusing to pay for essentials like food or medicine, preventing you from working or earning money, getting angry over spending money, making you responsible for their debts 

What is coercive control? 

Coercive control includes repeated use of abusive behaviours that over time create fear and takes away the person’s freedom and independence. It includes abuse used to hurt, humiliate, isolate, frighten, or threaten.  

Controlling is about taking away your ability to make your own decisions. 

Spotting coercive control may be difficult as the behaviours in isolation may not be easily seen as abuse but combined over time have an emotional impact. You may feel like you are walking on eggshells, that everything is your fault, or that you cannot trust yourself and your own experiences. 

Coercive control can look different for nonbinary people, where your identity could be weaponised to create fear, shame and isolation. 

There are 12 signs of coercive control 

  1. Isolating you from your support system 
  1. Monitoring your activity throughout the day 
  1. Denying you freedom and autonomy 
  1. Gaslighting 
  1. Name-calling and severe criticism 
  1. Limiting access to money and controlling finances. Coercing you, to take care of all the domestic duties  
  1. Turning your children against you.  
  1. Controlling aspects of your health and your body. Making jealous accusations about the time you spend with family or friends 
  1. Regulating your sexual relationship 
  1. Threatening your children or pets as an extreme form of intimidation  

As of 26 May 2025, coercive control is a criminal offence in Queensland.  

What options are there for safety and support?  

If you are experiencing or escaping domestic and family violence you can seek safety and support from a number of services and organisations.  You can speak to: 

  • your GP  
  • your counsellor 
  • a DFV service
  • an LGBTIQA+ support service 
  • LGBTI Legal Service or another community legal centre 

When reaching out for information and support from services you will most likely talk about how to plan to keep safe and what supports you may need.  

Not everyone feels ready or willing to report the abuse to police or to go through a court process. When you report to police, they may simply take your statement and do nothing more or they may become involved in the matter and take it to court.  

If you are experiencing an emergency where your safety is at great risk, you may consider calling 000. Police and ambulance would likely come to you.   

How can the law protect me from domestic and family violence? 

When police attend an incident of DFV and they believe someone requires urgent protection from harm, they can issue a Police Protection Notice (PPN). A PPN provides temporary safety orders until the matter can be heard in a Magistrates Court. 

The individual being protected by the PPN is the ‘aggrieved’. The person who must follow the conditions on the PPN is the ‘respondent’. 

Once the matter is at court, the police can apply for a Temporary Protection Order (TPO) on behalf of the aggrieved. TPOs can be made urgently by the magistrate where there is immediate danger of continuing violence, and they generally remain in force until the next court date. The magistrate will consider extending the TPO at each subsequent court date. 

At the final court appearance for a matter, a magistrate may make a final protection order, which generally lasts for five years. Changes can be made to a final protection order through an application to the court.  

All protection orders include the condition that the respondent must be of good behaviour and must not commit domestic violence. They can also include conditions that prevent a respondent from: 

  • approaching the aggrieved at home or work 
  • staying in a shared home 
  • approaching other people named in the order
  • going to a child’s school  

These conditions are enforced by police, and breaches of these conditions can lead to criminal charges. 

What if the police don’t apply for a protection order? 

Sometimes the police don’t get involved in instances of DFV, particularly where no reports have been made and they have not attended a call out to a home or other place. 

If you are experiencing DFV but have not received assistance from the police, you can apply for a protection order yourself. You can also enlist the help of a lawyer, friend or family member.  

Once the matter goes to court the process is the same as for police applications (outlined above).  

Private applications are as equally as strong as police applications, and any resulting orders are enforceable by police.  

If you would like legal advice and assistance with completing an application, please contact LGBTI Legal Service . 

What happens after the court has made a temporary or final protection order?  

Once a protection order is made, the aggrieved must follow the orders. If the aggrieved does not follow the orders and continues to use violence or abuse, they are breaching the orders. This is a criminal offence. When orders are being breached your safety is at risk. You may also need to update your safety plan at this time. 

If the aggrieved breaches the protection orders, you can  

  • Contact your support worker for safety planning and support,  
  • Contact the police to report the breach, 
  • Contact LGBTI Legal Service for advice.  

I am experiencing domestic and family violence. Where can I go for help? 

There are a number of services available who can assist LGBTIQA+ people experiencing DFV. 

If your safety is at risk, consider calling 000. It is likely police and ambulance will come to you.  

For general support and assistance with safety planning, you can contact these organisations that specialise in assisting LGBTIQA+ people 

  • QLife | 1800 184 527 | web-based counselling, referrals and support 

You can also contact generalist services for support. These services may have more resources to provide supports that smaller LGBTIQA+ specific services cannot provide, such as longer-term safety housing. Nonbinary people can choose to call DV Connect through either the Men’s Line or Women’s Line and should receive the same support whichever line they call. 

  • 1800RESPECT | 1800 737 732 | information and support available 24/7 

Everyone deserves to have access to the support they need when experiencing DFV, but nonbinary people still face barriers in getting support. Many support organisations were created to support only women. Though they may have expanded to offer their services to nonbinary people, you may experience difficulties or discrimination trying to access support through a general service. Some services do not offer support to any nonbinary people. You may make the personal decision to hide your identity so you can receive the help you need. 

If you are looking for legal support for DFV, you can contact: 

For further information, take a look at the resources below.